your favorite punching bag

2022-12-07 21:04:25 the thing about being alone is that it’s so peaceful and freeing and cool apart from the evenings you descend into literal hell ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-12-05 21:26:25 i should have been like my brother. i should have learned to scream. ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-12-05 21:19:33 i am still searching for my father's love in all the corners of the world. ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-30 18:40:44 everything i write is a cry for help but what will i say when they’ll reach my door step? save me from me ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-29 18:22:09 how did i grow old so young? how did i forget to live before i lived at all? ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-27 16:33:21 somedays my heart feels so close to the surface like it wants to take me somewhere and is tired of the limitations of my body, of my feet always walking in the wrong direction. this isn’t really an original thought. i have told you this before. someone almost loved me and they come to me in dreams even now and i never think about him except when it is dark out and i am in the backseat of the car and no one can see the alternate life passing through me, the one where he laughs forever and i press my ear as close as i can because i am tired of the limitations of my body. someday things will be different. the losses will fall off of me like particles from another world, landing on a small unsuspecting planet. i will garden and have at least one big window where i can see the sky and have the good sense to look. but today i asked God to empty my heart of whatever wasn’t meant for it and he is still in there somewhere, occupying a small space in a big way. if i let myself reach out to touch it then i would probably find out that there’s small space inside of him too that flinches when he looks at the moon. of course it doesn’t help to know that. it doesn’t help to know that the dark sky is a cauldron we both sit in to punish ourselves for the life we didn’t have. ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-26 19:06:22 the fact that laughter is contagious is so beautiful to me. like oh that made you smile? that made you happy? well then, i have no choice but to be happy with you! ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-26 13:16:54 i wanna say i’m gonna fold my heart away real small until it’s time to use it again i wanna mean it and hide it away from the unsure hands that reach for it and turn it around and hold it up to the light and then place it down somewhere i can’t find but the truth is i unfold it everyday and send it out into the world and each day it changes and when it comes back to me it’s unrecognizable and by the time i’ve relearned it, it happens again and before i know it it’s already something new ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ

2022-11-25 22:38:48 let me tell you a secret, sometimes i think this might be all a bad dream. every now and then, when the world is quiet enough, when the yellow light hits the ceiling just right, i feel like a child again. sometimes i wish i could find the spot where time is the weakest, touch it, tear it apart, and wake up on the sofa. from the tv, a laugh track. i'm pretending to sleep. it's summer. see, i can hear children playing outside. see, there's a mosquito trying to get in. see, my heart isn't aching. see? ክፈት / አስተያየት ይስጡ